Violated by a Worm

--This one goes out to my dear friend Ivia in D.C.

I nearly died today.

I was on my way home from Old Navy (it's like crack...but on sale) when I saw something long and green out of the corner of my eye. While driving 60km/hr, I craned my neck to see what it could be; to my horror I discovered it was one of those disgusting worms that slink down from trees around this time of year. I tried to watch the road, but something instinctual, but terribly misguided, in me seemed to insist that the worm was a much greater threat than other vehicles. So I watched the worm make its descent from the top of my driver's side window and onto my blouse.

I cringed. It was bloody awful. My brain was flooded by scenes from movies: Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom--the blond girl wanders into a tunnel that is populated entirely by giant insects; King Kong (the recent and terrible)--the blond girl has to choose between getting felt up by large insects or be eaten by a dinosaur...for some reason she chooses the insects.

My breathing became labored--I could not hold back a terrified squeal, which might have been a less embarrassing, but a more unwarranted, scream if I didn't exert a bit of self-control. But, finally I saw a side street, which I quickly turned down. I found an out of the way spot, pulled on the e-brake, released the seatbelt, flung the door open, and stepped carefully (yet hastily, lemme tell ya!) out of the car. I didn't want to smush the creature onto myself...or anger it in any way.

Having established it's exact location on my garment, I proceeded to execute the Ridoworm Manouever--which is a fancy name for shaking shirts and flicking fingers.

The worm was dispatched.

I returned to my vehicle and drove away, but I still feel like something might be crawling on me.

Will that feeling ever subside?